‘Mary Millington meets Super-Stud!!’

SYNOPSIS:  

IMDB Quote:

Husband and wife acting team Alan Lake and Diana Dors sink to the lowest point of their respective careers in this tedious British sex comedy. The long, drawn-out plot fails to hold the attention and Lake’s performance, as sex-obsessed astrologer David Galaxy, is annoying and virtually unwatchable, (why any woman would fall for his hackneyed chat-up lines is anyone’s guess). Despite a fairly interesting role as a wealthy businesswoman, Dors doesn’t fair much better either. The movie’s one saving grace is a brief turn fom 70′s sex bomb Mary Millington, playing one of Galaxy’s numerous sexual ‘conquests’. Mary’s performance is funny and mesmerizing but even she fails to save a pitiful film.  

IMDB Quote:

David Galaxy is a selfish, narcissistic, sexist, racist and homophobic little astrologer who gets women for to have sex with him using the most hackneyed of chat-up lines and litters his conversation with p**s-poor attempts at humour. Quite why the filmmakers of this incompetent mess expect the audience to follow this fellow around for an hour and a half of nothing very much happening is the question. The only element of plot is that a couple of coppers are set on fitting him up for a 5 year old armed robbery – when they succeed in sending him down, one doesn’t deplore police corruption as much as applaud them for ridding the streets and our screen of this odious personage.

Most of the script is a random collection of softcore sexual encounters (repulsive to the eye as they feature Galaxy) and petty contretemps – sometimes these two elements collide, as when Galaxy farts whilst screwing a psychologist girlfriend (you have to feel sorry for the splendid Sally Faulkner playing this part) which causes a bitter ruckus. There’s a supremely distasteful leering sub-plot involving a society heiress who has had sex with thousands of men but has never had an orgasm (a role absurdly played by the common-as-muck former porn star Mary Millington); quite what the other men who schtupped her must have been like is unimaginable, because the disgusting Galaxy succeeds in getting her off – perhaps she has a kink for sleazeballs, but the script doesn’t go in for that level of psychological nuance. Did I say script? That supremely flatters a screenplay chock-full of unbelievable incidents, poorly thought-out police procedural and dialogue which would shame a remedial school drama class improvisation.

As for the acting, nearly everyone isn’t bothering. Alan Lake’s turn as Galaxy is the epitome of charmless incompetent self-indulgence. And what a shame it is to see John Moulder-Brown, so good in Deep End and who worked with Visconti, reduced to appearing in the thankless role of a clichéd plod in this reeking pile of dirt.

Some of the British sexploitation films of the 70s manage to give us a peak into what Britain was like at the time; this film simply manages to show us what went on in the fetid imaginations of a bunch of talentless, middle-aged men.

Cast
 (Cast overview, first billed only)
Alan Lake … David Galaxy
Glynn Edwards … Chief Inspector Evans
Anthony Booth … Steve
Diana Dors … Jenny Stride

John Moulder-Brown … Sergeant Johnson
Milton Reid … Eddie
Bernie Winters … Mr. Pringle
Kenny Lynch … Joe
Mary Millington … Millicent Cumming
Sally Faulkner … Amanda
Rosemary England … Sandra
Queenie Watts … David Galaxy’s Mother
Cindy Truman … Anne
Vicki Scott … Charlotte (as Vicky Scott)
Alec Mango … Pembleton

 IMDb.............:  User Rating of 2.0/10

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DVD details

   * Health + quality checks (bold “No” indicates potential issue) Region-free? Yes
   * Free of Prohibited User Operations? Yes
   * Main PGC contains more than one chapter? Yes
   * Video at maximum resolution? Yes
   * Video is MPEG-2? Yes
   * Contains subtitles? No
   * Gapless audio/sub stream assignments? Yes
   * Video doesn’t use Pan&Scan? Yes

   * General disc specifications Total number of titlesets: 9
   * Provider ID: DAVID_GALAXY_AFFAIR

   * VTS_02 specifications Attributes: MPEG-2 720×576 (PAL) (Probably interlaced) (4:3)
   * # of title play maps: 1
   * Number of PGCs: 1
   * Longest Program Chain #: 1

   * PGC #1 specifications Playback time: 01h32m37s
   * # of angles: 1
   * # of chapters: 13
   * # of subtitle tracks: 0 (0 ghost streams)
   * # of audio tracks: 1 (0 ghost streams)
   * Audio track 1: AC3, 2ch (en)

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